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A Man Loving a Man

from Inside the Mad Linguist by Jonathan Best

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lyrics

Why am I so scared
Why am I so blue
Why is it so hard to be close to you
Let me turn away
Let me walk home slow
There’s too much on my mind
So just let me go

But when I get home and turn on the TV
That box expects me to be what it wants me to be
I’m finding it hard to understand
What it means to be a man

I have a place inside
Where no man ever goes
Even my own heart it doesn’t know
It is so well hid
So I can’t get hurt
But now I think that I’m under orange alert

When I was just a boy my very best friend
Touched me like I never wanted it to end
But my friends laughed and they shamed me
Then I grew up to be a man

I wanted every woman I could see
I tried so hard to be what a man is supposed to be
I found it hard to understand
A man loving a man

Why am I so scared
Why am I so blue
Why is it so hard to be close to you
Let me turn away
Let me walk home slow
Right back to that place
No man ever goes

But maybe if I could just set myself free
And be the man that only I want to be
Then maybe I could understand
A man loving a man

Maybe if I could just love myself head to knee
And keep loving myself unconditionally
Then maybe I could understand
A man loving a man
Maybe even I could understand
A man loving a man

credits

from Inside the Mad Linguist, released September 27, 2012
words and music by Jonathan Best

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Jonathan Best Prescott, Arizona

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